Beyond Our Mistakes
by mildlybizarre
Summary: Haley's miles away chasing a sketchy dream. Nathan's driving full speed trying to get his wife back. Peyton's breakdown sends her into the hospital. Lucas will finally tell who he loves. 48 hours of bad decisions sends two characters into a car crash.
1. A Quiet Tuesday Night

He arose from the wreckage with nothing left to give. He looked at the mess behind and couldn't believe it. This hadn't happened. It couldn't have. A small pool of blood reached his feet. It was over. Forty-eight hours ago, he would've laughed at a story like this. Now he sat down a few feet away from a crash that represented all his mistakes and he wept.

**48 hours ago Tuesday Night**

"I knew you'd come." Chris said as she walked towards him.

"I was on my way home to Nathan…" Haley paused for a second as if she had to remind herself what she meant to say. "…but I ended up here." She finished with tears in her eyes. _Am I really doing this? _She thought as she looked at the train station and the people around her. _Yes, this is real._

On one side there was Nathan and her responsibilities. On the other there was Chris and her far-fetched dreams. Her heart wouldn't let her settle when she wanted so much more. Haley hated herself for being so selfish. Yet, no matter how rational she tried to be, she would always be a dreamer. That was why she married Nathan, why she gave him a chance in the first place, and that was why she was on a train at 10 o' clock at night to New York City. Her once easily controlled, predictable future was now completely unknown. It was a bird disappearing into the horizon. Where it was headed, no one knew.

Chris held her hand as the train rode on. What do you do when the things you want most directly contradict each other? Haley looked down at the ticket in her hands, her entry into a new unfamiliar world. The train began to shake as she examined it closely, "One way ticket: Tree Hill to New York City Non-stop." It began to rain lightly outside the train. Her heart thumped loudly in her chest. For the first time in the night, she thought about the consequences of her decision and how Nathan would take the news. In fact, he wouldn't even where she was.

Nathan

Nathan blew out the last candle on the table. He threw away the now cold dinner he had ordered from the expensive restaurant which he had driven half an hour each way to get to. He hadn't touched his plate…come to think of it, he wasn't hungry at all anymore. Haley had said she would be home late but this was ridiculous. The café closed two hours ago. "What could she possibly be doing?" He didn't realize he said aloud. He knew what she was doing though. He knew exactly where she was…well not locationwise…but he knew exactly who she was with. He tried to cast out these suspicions in his mind but they were too strong for him. He picked up the vase he had filled with flowers just a few hours ago and threw it across the room. It shattered into a thousand tiny pieces, never to be whole again.

Afterwards he didn't even attempt to clean up the mess. He left the hollow apartment as if it wasn't there at all. Nathan walked the dark, empty streets for many hours thinking over the last few days. He knew it wasn't a good idea to try to push Haley away from Chris but he didn't know what else to do. For someone so seemingly confident on the outside, he was very insecure deep inside. He roamed aimlessly until about 3 o' clock in the morning when he came to a conclusion. "I trust Haley. She would never cheat on me. I've got to be insane. I'll probably get home to find her worried sick about me." He spoke to himself and then headed to his apartment, but no such miracle awaited him there.

Peyton

"You know this guy?" The drug dealer asked her as Jake walked towards her. She looked into Jake's eyes, terrified of what he thought of her at this moment but more relieved that he was finally back. "Jake, I've missed you so much."

"I know." He said and nodded. Then he hugged her tight, as if he'd never leave her again. The drug dealer and all their surroundings disappeared so that just the two of them were left embracing. And then she woke up.

Peyton scanned her brain, trying to remember if it had happened or not. She looked at the broken picture frame of Jake by her bed. No. It was just a dream. Jake was still many miles away. She looked forward to her desk. A small bag of white powder sat there, judging her and condemning her. She got up and looked at the sheet of paper beside it: "Wednesday night band performing: Straylight Run, First song: The Mistakes We Knew We Were Making" _Sometimes you have to sacrifice for the things you want. _Peyton rationalized her actions. _But sometimes the things you want won't actually make you happy. _A voice inside said quietly but she blocked it out of her mind.

Outside, Peyton's front door opened and someone came inside. He walked through her house, entered her room, and sat down on her bed like he was at home. He had a nervous smile on his face at first until he saw the shape Peyton was in.

"Peyton?" Lucas found her passed out and next to the now open bag of white powder. He picked her up, took her to his truck, and then to the hospital. As he drove, Lucas half watched the road and half watched Peyton's unconscious form. He prayed to God that she would be ok.

Nathan

When Nathan returned to his apartment, it was still empty but the phone was ringing. He answered it quickly, with hopes that it was Haley with some kind of explanation. "Hello?" He could hear heavy breathing. "Haley, is that you?" It was silent for a few seconds. Then the phone hung up in a rush but not before Nathan heard Chris say, "Come on Hales" on the other side. Nathan dialed star 67 and someone answered, "New York City Train Stati-" Nathan was out the door before the end of the message.

He drove full of fear, regret, and rage. He was afraid Haley wouldn't come back to him. He regretted pushing her away. But by the time he got to New York the anger would be the only thing anyone could notice.

At that exact moment, Haley and Chris arrived at their hotel room. Haley looked out the 15 story high window. A storm was brewing.


	2. Fighting Brick Walls

**46 hours ago Midnight Wednesday **

They wouldn't let him in to see her. They wouldn't tell him how she was. They said they needed to speak to a family member. Couldn't they understand that her only family member was out at sea and out of contact? Lucas paced the hospital waiting room. He noticed a couple, probably in their late 40s, that looked as tense as he was. He took a seat beside them and asked who they were waiting for.

"It's our son." The women said with teardrops hovering in her eyes as she struggled to not let them fall. "He got into a car crash but they wouldn't operate without parental permission. They waited half an hour for us to get here before they tried to help him. It could be too late."

"Lady, I could be sued for operating on a minor without parental permission." A doctor who had overheard the conversation said from behind Lucas.

"Our son could die!" She screamed at him and finally let the tears come streaming down her face. Her husband put his arm around her and calmed her down. Lucas looked over at the doctor but refused to judge what he had done. The doctor was in a tough position. He really could've been sued for trying to save the women's son. It was a shame.

Lucas left the couple and walked over to a little boy he saw sitting by himself on the other side of the room. The child was the only person in the entire waiting room that was smiling. Lucas assumed he didn't know what was going on. He asked the boy his name.

"I'm Jimmy." The little boy said and then continued. "My mommy's coming home today."

Lucas smiled at him. Then a man pushing a woman in a wheel chair came towards them. "Come on Jim. We're going home." The man Lucas assumed was his father said. Jimmy jumped into his mother's arms and she held him close. Then she whispered in his ear just loud enough to hear, "I'll never leave you again."

After the family left, a doctor walked into the room and asked if there was anyone there for a Peyton Sawyer. Lucas quickly walked up to him. The doctor recognized Lucas as the guy pestering all the nurses for information. He hesitated for a moment before he said: "You may see her now."

Lucas noticed that Peyton was asleep as he quietly crept into her room. She looked so peaceful lying there. He pulled up a chair next to her bed, sat down, and took hold of her hand. Peyton's body turned to face him under the covers but she remained asleep.

Nathan

On and on, the icy roads came at him but Nathan remained at full speed. He couldn't get himself to slow down. Who knows what could happen if he lost even two minutes? His heart pounded beneath his chest. He hadn't slept all night so he was mostly running on adrenaline. His stereo was blasting at the highest volume to keep his mind off…well, everything. He didn't want to think about how Chris had tricked Haley into leaving with him or worse, what they could be doing right now.

Nathan noticed a sign as he sped by it: New York State Line 3 miles. Two minutes later, he crossed the state line and saw bright lights up ahead. He was there. Then it hit him: Where would he look for them?

Haley and Chris

A huge sparkling city was in view below her, yet all she could think about was a small apartment back in Tree Hill. She took a picture of the city outside her window on her camera phone and titled it: I miss you. Chris noticed her taking the picture and said, "Isn't it beautiful?" A tear rolled down her cheek. He wrapped his arms around Haley with no idea. "Tomorrow, big things begin."

Haley nodded and replied, "I should really get some rest." She left his embrace and laid down on one of the queen size beds behind them. Chris joined her crawling in on the other side, uninvited. By 3 am, Chris was fast asleep while Haley hadn't slept at all. She buried her face in her pillow and cried. _This is my dream. _Haley thought, trying to cheer herself up. _If Nathan and I are meant to be together, it'll work out despite all this. He'll forgive me…right? _She stayed stuck on that thought until she finally drifted off around 4:30 am.

Lucas and Peyton

After a little over an hour, Peyton awoke. She looked up at Lucas who hadn't taken his eyes off her since he had entered the room. He rubbed his hand against hers and said, "Hey you. How do you feel?"

"It feels like I tried to fight a brick wall with my face." She replied.

"Well you should see the shape the brick wall is in." Lucas joked back.

She smiled at him…that gorgeous smile. A few hours ago, he thought he might never see it again. He didn't want to get into serious stuff until later. So for the moment, he simply glared back into her beautiful eyes.

"Look Peyton, I need to tell you something." He breathed in deep and then out slowly.

"What?" She curled her eyebrows at notice of how nervous he looked. _But then again think of how I must look right now. _She thought.

"The reason I came to your house tonight…" He paused. These things are never easy to do. "…well I needed you to know that I…"

"Oh my God, Peyton are you ok?" Brooke ran in and asked frantically. _Perfect timing, Brooke. _Lucas was upset but relieved to be interrupted. He knew that he shouldn't wait. Carpe Diem. Seize the day. There's no better time than now. But he couldn't help but feel like he wasn't ready.

"Yes I'm ok. Brooke you can get off me now." Brooke released her.

"P. Sawyer, if you ever have a near death experience again, I swear I'll kill you!" Peyton smiled at her best friend and then looked around for Lucas. He was gone.

Nathan

"Are you sure you didn't see them? I can tell you the description again. One's a beautiful brown haired young lady. The other is a man with messy hair and a kind of deformed face. Here, I have a picture of the girl." Nathan said to a man at the newspaper stand.

"Sir, I told you. I have not seen them."

"But security said to come here. He said everyone goes past here."

"He probably just wanted you to leave him alone." The man said, clearly annoyed. Nathan's face fell. "Alright…" The man conceded. "…I really haven't seen them but my friend who works the 8 to midnight shift probably did. His name is Raul. You can call him on this number." The man wrote 10 digits on a magazine. Nathan held his hand out for the magazine. The man shook his head. "You have to buy it first."

_Cheesy, no-good newspaper stand clerk… _Nathan thought as he paid. "If you're lying to me, I'll be back."

"Trust me, I wouldn't want that." The man said seriously to the back of his head as Nathan walked to a pay phone. He picked up the receiver and didn't hesitate to dial the number. _Yea, It's late... _He thought as he looked at his watch, 2:53 am. _…but this is important._

"Hello. Who's this?" A sleepy voice answered on the other side.

"I need your help. Have you seen…"

"Yes, I remember them."


	3. Three Small Words

**39 ½ hours ago Wednesday morning**

No matter what happens the night before, a fresh morning starts everything anew. Choices made the day before have to be rethought. Mistakes made have to be let go. A sunrise through the morning dew on a hotel room window signals to all who see it that it is time to move on from yesterday. What's done is done. Today is all we'll ever have.

Nathan got up quickly at 6:30 am. He had only gotten to sleep at 4:30 am but sleep wasn't important. He was close. He knew it. The man he called said they were headed to this hotel. But the man at front desk wouldn't tell him what room they were in. "For our guests protection, we cannot reveal any information" were his exact words. It didn't matter though. It was only a minor setback. He knew they had to be here and he was determined to find them. He didn't come all this way to go home empty handed. The problem was, for all he knew, they could be next door to him or 10 floors away. He decided the only way to find them was to keep watch over the lobby. They had to go through there sooner or later. He ate a rushed breakfast at the restaurant and found a seat in the center of the lobby. Then he waited and waited, watching every figure that crossed his sight carefully.

Haley and Chris

"Wake up beautiful." Haley awoke to Chris planting a kiss on her forehead. She shivered at this and jumped out of bed.

"I'm going to take a shower." She said to him as she walked into the bathroom.

"Ok, but hurry. We have to get to the studio at 8." He said to a closed bathroom door.

By 7:15, Haley and Chris went down to the donut stand next to the lobby. While Haley bought food, Chris noticed the back of someone's head looked familiar. The guy was just sitting there, examining everyone that passed, like he was looking for someone. _Wait a second! _Chris soon realized who it was.

Lucas

Lucas awoke in the hospital lobby that morning. He didn't want to leave Peyton but he couldn't bring himself to face her either. He had gotten so close. Then Brooke had come in and sent him miles away again. He knew he couldn't leave this hospital without telling Peyton how he really felt. But he couldn't get a moment alone with her. He was in a confusing situation. He had fallen asleep hoping that by morning a chance would present itself. He finally decided it was time to go back to Peyton's room.

"Hey. Where'd you go?" Peyton asked as he walked in.

"I just…umm…had something I had to do." Lucas replied, noticing a snoring Brooke on the other side of the room.

"Oh." Peyton looked into Lucas' eyes. "Well it just seemed like you were in the middle of something. Aren't you wearing the same clothes as yesterday?" She asked, puzzled by the way he had acted the night before.

"Well, yea but I washed them." He said hoping to change the subject soon.

"That's what you had to do so bad? Go home and wash clothes? Geez man, you left without even saying goodbye."

Lucas breathed heavily and looked down at the tiles on the floor. He had been rude and now he had tried to lie to her. _Great! I just keep giving her reasons to be mad. _He thought before he looked up to find Peyton smiling.

"I'm messing with you, Luke. Brooke told me she saw you in the lobby. Relax. What's up with you?"

"Nothing. Well, actually there's something. It's pretty big too."

"What? Is that what you were trying to tell me before Brooke came in?"

"Yea. I've realized that I…"

"Haha. Luke finally got the guts to come back?" Brooke said as she yawned.

"Dammit Brooke!" Both Lucas and Peyton said in unison. "Whoops. Did we say that aloud?"

"Fine. You don't have to tell me twice. I know when I'm not wanted." Brooke said as she left the room.

"As I was saying…" Lucas started again.

"Peyton, you want to give me money for food?" Brooke's head peaked back into the room.

"I love you, Peyton!" Lucas screamed over Brooke's interruption.

Three dumbfounded faces looked around the room. Even Lucas was surprised he had finally said it.

Nathan

Nathan was in a daze of blank face after blank face. After an hour of keeping watch, his lack of sleep had caught up with him. He could hardly keep his eyes open. He watched everyone around him closely. To him, they were all suspects. Men and women in suits on business trips hurried through the lobby. Families on vacations took pictures of each other by the giant Christmas tree. A man went from guest to guest trying to sell everything from onion bagels to pirated DVDs. Chris and Haley walked past Nathan and headed out the front doors. Bellmen pushed carts of luggage to the elevators of the large hotel. Wait…Chris and Haley walked past Nathan and headed out the front doors? Nathan was up chasing them in a flash. By the time they had reached the lobby doors, Nathan's fist headed straight into the Chris' face. He fell to the ground with a bloody nose. Nathan looked down breathing fast. But it wasn't Chris or Haley either. The man held his hands over his face and shivered in fear. Then he screamed, "No! Stop! Some guy paid me to do this." Nathan's eyes scanned the lobby. They had to be nearby.

"Come on, Hales. We've got to go." Chris said as he hurried her out the other side of the lobby. Nathan saw them. This time he was sure. He saw a chocolate cream donut in the girl's hand. It had to be Haley.

"What's going on?" She asked as Chris pushed her forward, out the hotel doors. Outside Haley could tell it was many degrees below freezing. The sky was roaring above.

"Nothing. Nothing. It's just that time is money." He said as he looked back to see Nathan on close pursuit behind. Haley's feet left a trail of footprints in the snow as she ran. She turned her head to see Nathan chasing after her. She froze in her tracks. They had reached Chris' rental car. Nathan was seconds away from being at her side. She asked herself. _What's it going to be?_

Clouds moved to and fro above. Unrecognizable noises could be heard from the heavens. Puffy white drops of snow fell down on everything in sight. Then all of sudden the clouds cleared away. The storm disappeared. The noises ceased. It was calm again. All that was left was a message in the sky.

Haley paused a moment before she got into the car. Chris hit the petal and they were off. She looked back as a tear streamed down her cheeks.

"Wait, stop." She said softly to Chris. He stopped the car and looked back at Nathan and then to his side at Haley. His dream was slipping away…

"Haley, you can't let him hold you back." He replied. Haley nodded slightly and Chris took that as agreement. He started up the car again. Nathan noticed the car moving again but he continued to run after them. He briefly caught up with them and tapped on Haley's window as the car slipped away. She looked up at him with remorseful eyes and wrote three small words on the dew of her window. Nathan ran with the car for a few yards before he couldn't keep up anymore. Chris didn't notice what she had wrote. He assumed she was just waving goodbye.

Nathan stood in his place, breathless and watched the car until it disappeared. He was severely confused but he would wait for her. She said that she loved him and that was enough for him.


	4. Hoping for Rain in a Blizzard

**38 hours ago 8 am Wednesday morning**

Seated at the bottom step of the stairs before the hotel doors, Nathan buried his head in his knees. He crossed arms around his legs to keep warm. He didn't like snow. The freezing cold chaos had never been friendly to him. He remembered breaking his arm in the sixth grade when he had slipped off his skateboard in the frozen mess. He remembered days where he couldn't practice basketball outside. He remembered the lack of sunlight and the storms raging while he was stuck indoors. Now rain, rain was different. Rain always had an unexplainable way of cheering him up. You might wonder, why would he stay outside in the snow if he hated it so? Well first of all, he saw no reason to go back in the hotel. Haley was gone again. And second, his dream for rain instead of snow was like the small hope he had carried to New York. _If it could just rain… _He thought. _…if I could just have some kind of sign, some reason to go on, something to help me keep hope... _Nathan had never seen himself as a dreamer, hoping for rain in a blizzard. He got up and decided it was finally time to go back inside. _I'll get some hot chocolate and then I'll feel better… _He thought when something made him a pause. One clear drop flashed past him to the ground. He turned around and looked out at the city before him. It was pouring rain.

Haley and Chris

When they had gotten a few blocks away, it began to rain. Haley turned her face so that Chris won't notice her tears. She stared out the window: This wasn't everything she wanted. This wasn't about her dream. She had been telling herself that since she left but it was just a distraction. She didn't want to face the real reason she was running…

The tires made noises as they splashed through the puddles forming on the ground. Haley looked down at the ring on her finger. She had forgotten she was wearing it until this moment. She thought about taking it off. _No, then I'll lose it. _She observed it for a while: its simplicity. The gold band around her finger symbolized so much. The diamond was small and humble but it shined like nothing Haley had ever seen. She remembered all the good times: their first kiss, their wedding, their first night together, just about every time she was with him. She also remembered the harder times, the struggles but even those times she knew they would make it through. This time she wasn't so sure.

She had had a dream the night before she left: _She was sitting in the living room of a huge house. There were awards and trophies all over the room. Nathan's and his friends' eyes were all glued to the television: The 2012 superbowl. As she watched all of them cheer and celebrate for whatever team won, she felt far away. They were just an image. She felt like something was missing. She was afraid she'd never figure out what it was. All of a sudden she got the urge to get out, as fast as possible. She rose from her seat and went out the door. Then she ran down the sidewalk. She was out of shape and soon panting but that didn't matter. Nathan called to her from the house but she wouldn't look back. She ran and ran and ran to some far stretching horizon she could never reach._ When Haley awoke that night, she thought the dream over. She was happy with Nathan now, but would they be happy together for the rest of their lives?

That was the real reason she had left. Though she had come up with a thousand other excuses to get on the train with Chris, without that one reason, this morning she would've happily awoken with Nathan at her side.

The temporary rain turned into snow again. The roads ahead were icy and slippery. Haley knew her decision would be hard but long term it was for the best. There were many things she had to do before she went home. She had to fill the space of that empty feeling she had in the dream. But first, she had to figure out where it came from. Chris soon realized the street before him was blocked with snow. He parked the car and they began to walk the rest of the way to the studio. "It isn't far." He told Haley as they struggled through the cold weather.

Lucas, Peyton and Brooke

Peyton's eyebrows were curled in shock. Her mouth was slightly open. Her eyes stared at the space between herself and Lucas. That expression had been frozen on her face for the last half an hour. Brooke kept shaking her head, looking from Peyton and then to Lucas, back and forth in apprehension as if she just couldn't understand. Lucas waited patiently. He wasn't leaving without an answer.

What goes through your head at times like these, possibly life-changing moments where you put your true self out there? What are you supposed to think about when you are in the space between all you want and failing all your hopes? You spend all your time preparing for a moment like this, but what do you do when you finally get there? How should you feel when all you can do is wait? When you tell someone you love them, you give them the power to pull you together or to rip you apart. Some spend their whole lives hidden behind their secrets, wondering about what could've been. "Is it better to wait and wonder or try and fail?" Well at least if you try, you can say you gave it our best, right? But it's so hard to fight off fears of rejection. What are you supposed to do if the one person you thought could make you happy doesn't want you back? That was what ran through Lucas' head as he waited for Peyton to make or break him. Unfortunately, she did neither. He thought the waiting was finally over. It never really is…

"Lucas, I don't know what to say." Peyton finally awoke out of her daze.

"Say you love me too." Lucas said, all his hope lying on those words.

"I don't know. I thought we were over…remember the mess we made last time?" She said looking over at Brooke.

"I remember. It doesn't matter. I can't help how I feel."

"It does too matter. You're gonna have to keep it in your pants this time!" Brooke interrupted AGAIN and started pushing Lucas out of the room.

"Brooke, stop!"

"No loverboy, you're not doing this again." Brooke spat out. Lucas was surprised to find how strong she was. He landed on the hospital hallway wall and the door slammed shut behind him.

"Can you believe that? Just when we're all on friendly terms again, he gets horny."

"I don't think that's what he meant Brooke."

"Horny/in love…whatever, same thing."

Peyton looked up at her friend. Underneath all the anger, Brooke seemed truly upset. Peyton wasn't going to hurt her again. Whatever she felt for Lucas had to be let go. This was the conclusion she came to and she didn't think about it twice. That was what she had to do rather she liked it or not. Logic over the heart: that's what we always try to choose. Somehow though it never really works out that way.

Haley and Chris

"How much further is it?" Haley said as she fought her way on through the snow, shivering as she walked.

"We're almost there." Chris replied, not paying much attention to what he was saying.

"You said that five blocks ago."

"We're getting closer." Haley shook her head at his answer. They finally reached the studio building a mile and a half later. Chris had "stretched" the truth about the distance…_Could he be lying about other things?_ Haley thought but when she stepped inside, she forgot all about it. There it was! So much possibility lied right in front of her. _Maybe this is my dream after all. _Haley thought as she examined the brand new studio. She smiled for the first time since she left Tree Hill. _If only Nathan could be here… _She thought as Chris showed her around the place.

Nathan

When the rain stopped after a few minutes, Nathan decided he should re-examine the hotel, as if he had missed some kind of clue the first time. After interrogating a nearly frightened donut stand clerk, Nathan gave up on the lobby and headed to his room. He laid down on the bed and immediately fell asleep. After all, he was exhausted. He had barely slept at all the night before. While he slept, he dreamed of Haley and him together again. He dreamed of holding her in his arms and never letting her go.


	5. A Window

_How does she do this to do me?_ He asked himself as he sat on the floor in the hospital hall looking through the window on the door of Peyton's room. Lucas could faintly see the outline of her body sitting up through the glass. _Every word she says, every time she touches my hand…I go insane. How can one person have so much affect on me?_ He remembered a quote his English teacher had said when his class was reading The Scarlet Letter: "The one that gives you the most joy also gives you the most pain." He finally understood what it meant, the bittersweet feeling that is love. Lucas stared up at Peyton as she shook her head, apparently to something Brooke said. He had finally gotten the guts to let out all the emotions held in for so long and he hadn't gotten an answer. _The fear doesn't matter anymore. I have to know…and I need to speak with Peyton alone. _Lucas thought as a plan formed in his mind. Brooke had to be "distracted" for a little while. And Lucas knew just the man for the job.

Haley and Chris

"Because-" Haley's face fell at the interruption…again.

"No, you're off key. This song needs to be sang on a lower tone." The producer said in a hasty manner before he looked down at his watch, the third time in the last 5 minutes. "You need to get this right. I'm running late as it is." The producer was in his late twenties with black hair down to his neck and a goatee. He was overdressed in fancy, superfluous clothes. He had designer shoes, and, in Haley's opinion, he seemed to be staring at Chris a little too much.

"Because everything-" Haley started up but his voice cut in again.

"Good, better…but with feeling. Sing like you mean it."

"Because everything feels empty when you're not around." Haley finally finished the line.

"There it is! Convincing." The producer said with a sharp smile. He had no idea how real those words really were to Haley. "Well, I was a little unsure at first but you were right Chris. She's good. You two are perfect together. You'll start recording tomorrow. And now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off." He swiftly headed out the door without looking back.

"Did you hear that? We're perfect together." Chris said with a grin.

"Yea, I heard. He must've been drunk." Haley remarked a little surprised that she had said it aloud. _Well, there's a time for everything. _Haley thought while Chris babbled on.

"…What? Aren't you happy?"

"The producer said sing with feeling…so I did." Haley responded.

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Chris, I don't think you get it. I'm here to follow my dream, not to be with you."

"I understand that." Chris said looking Haley in the eye.

"No, you don't. You still have hopes. I can see it. But I need you to understand the truth." She said pulling away from his glance.

"Haley, you have to admit there is something between us." Chris said with his usual cockiness.

"We all want something new sometimes, but at the end of the day, no matter how hard I've fought it, there's only one person for me." She was being very clear with her words, making sure to get the message through. No more speaking in code or subtle hints, it was time to face the facts.

"Ok, ok…I'll back off. Don't worry about it. It's cool. We'll just be friends." Chris replied. Then the two headed outside for the long walk back to the car in the freezing cold. Sleet and snow brushed against her face as Haley struggled against reality and the weather. _Nathan will want me to come home now but I can't go yet… _She thought scanning her mind for a solution. _I'll ask him to stay with me. _She smiled at the thought. _Yes, then it will all work out. _She could have it all after all._ …but will Nathan leave all he knows, his friends, his family to be with me? _Her smile diminished as she stepped over the icy ground, her face aimed downwards. _I'm being selfish… _She thought as the wind carried her along but she didn't dare try to escape from the force pushing her forward.

Lucas

Lucas wandered through the hallways on an odd Wednesday morning. Everything looked so different from when he had been there last. The building felt so empty without Peyton there. He glared from face to face until he noticed the one he was searching for.

"Felix! Buddy! How you doing this morning?" Lucas said with a fake smile glued all over him as he put his hand on his shoulder. Felix looked at Lucas as if he was a mad man. Then he backed away, obviously creeped out by the notion.

"Lucas, if you're on drugs, you should at least have the decency to share."

"Drugs? No drugs. I just wanted to say hello to a good friend of mine." Felix looked behind him. He turned his head side to side. He stared out into the crowds of students heading to class.

"Well, where are they?" Felix remarked, his suspicions growing.

"Look, Felix, I think we got off on the wrong foot. We should have a fresh start. I mean now that you're dating Brooke we should be friends."

"Who told you that? And what do you really want?"

"Ok," Lucas pulled off his pretend smirk. "I'll cut the crap. Brooke is in the hospital with Peyton. I need to speak with Peyton alone. If you understand what I'm getting at…I need someone to distract Brooke for a while." Felix smiled. He loved having the upper hand.

"What's in it for me?"

"Well…"

**35 hours ago 11 am Wednesday morning**

Haley and Chris

"Haley, you know I'm right. You'll never be able to work with him following you around." Chris said as they entered the lobby.

"I can't keep running, Chris." Haley said, soaked from head to toe. Chris had tried to cover her with his umbrella but she refused. The rain reminded her of Nathan and right now she was holding onto everything and anything she could.

"Fine. Whatever. I'm going to buy a hot dog. I'll be right back."

"Ok…I'm going to check out the gift shop." Haley said as Chris slipped away from her sight. But she walked past the store and headed to the front desk. On the way, she inspected every one that she passed but couldn't find the person she sought for. When she reached the front desk, she was surprised to find Chris there as well. From his expression, Chris was just as shocked as she was.

"Well, I guess we're here for the same reason." Chris said undaunted. "Remember when I paid you to keep our room number in confidence?" He said to the familiar looking hotel clerk.

"Yes, of course. One guy that asked looked so frustrated." The clerk remarked with a smirk.

"Well I need another favor. Can you tell me the room number of a Nathan Scott?"

"Sure, but it wouldn't be much use. He checked out just a few minutes ago." It took just these few words to break Haley's heart into pieces and the worst of it was: it was all her fault.

**36 hours ago 10 am Wednesday morning**

Nathan

"Nathan let me go!" Haley yelled at him but he ran after her anyway. He slipped through the masses of people and nearly pushed over a man in a wheel chair who in turn yelled at Nathan, "You're never going to catch the girl this way." Nathan ignored the warnings and finally caught her just as Haley boarded the train. "This is just something I have to do," was the last thing Haley said to him before the train started up and floated away. He watched it disappear in disappointment and when it was gone all he could hear was loud distressing laughter. He shivered and awoke. He felt sweat on his forehead and remembered the twisted emotions from the dream. It had begun so happily but ended so horribly…but then again, maybe that wasn't the end at all. There are times in life where we find ourselves sinking in a lake of problems that seem too much to overcome. In situations like these, you either drown or learn to swim…

The dream made Nathan realize he was chasing after a dead end. He wasn't going to get Haley back like this and he didn't want to. The people that truly care about you don't let you go. He began throwing the few things he had brought to New York in his backpack. He rushed through the door, down to the lobby, and out of the illusion. One person alone cannot make a relationship work. It rained all around as he exited the hotel. Harder, faster, the drops intensified. He walked the sidewalks with the face of a free man and he had no idea why. It was such a sweet release.

**34 hours and 52 minutes ago 11:08 am Wednesday morning**

Haley and Chris

Chris slipped the clerk a ten-dollar bill. Then he smiled and turned to face Haley, but she was already gone. Through the hotel doors, down the steps, out into the rain, and head first into the crowds parading the New York City streets, Haley did what she couldn't do before. Sometimes finding the things you want isn't half as hard as getting yourself to admit you're searching for them. She stumbled along the streets. Raindrops tickled down on rooftops. Cars glided through the puddles in the streets. The sounds of the city were loud and she walked fast so that she wouldn't have to stop and think. So she wouldn't have to wonder what will happen if she didn't find him, if she didn't tell him everything…NOW. She rushed through the blank faces. She hurried along the sidewalk. She walked and walked and then she panicked. Her imagination took over: a mistake she couldn't take back, a car driving fast to Tree Hill, two broken hearts, and an empty feeling that wouldn't go away. The sidewalks came to a downward hill. She took careless, hasty steps. And then she slipped, and she fell. The drenched cement beneath her provided no friction. She slid down without control, without knowledge of the future. But finally the seemingly immeasurable falling came to an end. She pulled herself up and looked forth. And there he stood, a worried look on his face. They both came forward and met in the middle, without a word, arms around each other.


	6. Knee Deep in the Rubicon River

**24 hours ago 10pm Wednesday Night**

"_I'm so glad I found you…I thought I had lost you." Haley said as she shivered in the cold weather. "I don't know what I was thinking before. I've missed you so much."_

Nathan shook his head at the memory. It's strange how fast one moment turns into another. He thought back harder.

"_I need you in my life, Nathan. I can't do this without you." _

She told him everything would be ok now. Then he took her hand and they wandered through the streets of New York City for hours. They window shopped as they walked by the expensive stores. They spent the whole day just talking and catching up. They laughed at silly things and made jokes only each other understood. It had stopped raining for the most part, but he remembered this one moment. As the drops glimmered down, she looked into his eyes and asked him to kiss her without a word. And they stood there, a married couple making out on the sidewalk in the pouring rain. How does a beautiful, limitless moment like that transform into a moment like this? Huddled up in closet, Nathan glared down at the little bit of light glowing underneath the closet door.

"Haley, what's it going to be? Him or the music?" Nathan heard Chris say outside the closet.

"Why can't I have both?" She asked, clearly upset. Nathan recognized that knot in her throat Haley gets when she's about to cry.

"Haley, I won't work with you with him here. He's just a distraction."

"He's my husband."

"Whatever. You have to choose. I'm your ticket to the music. We could make it big."

"You think I can't do it without you?"

"I think you're letting him hold you back. This is your chance. Take it or leave it, Haley."

"Why won't you work with me if he stays?"

"He's going to get in the way. He hates me. Look, I want to help you get where you're going. You have a talent. We've got something here. Sometimes you have to make sacrifices to get what you really want." She nodded as Chris left the room. When the door shut, Haley opened the closet.

"I'm sorry about that. I was just afraid that if he saw you-"

"-That what? He'd leave you?"

"Nathan, this is like a dream come true for me. I need you to cut me some slack. I'm trying so hard. I just don't know what to do. I need your support on this."

"Alright. I'm here for you."

"Promise?"

"Yes."

"Through it all?"

"Through it all."

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course."

"I need you to go home." Her words rang in his ears. He shook his head.

"I'm not leaving without you." She looked into his eyes and nodded.

"I was hoping you'd say that. But things are going to get complicated..."

Lucas and Felix

Lucas walked up to Felix, who was standing by the hospital doors. "Do you have what I asked for?" Felix asked.

"Here you go. Happy now?" Lucas said as he handed him a set of keys.

"Very." He replied with a mischievous grin. "How'd you get these?"

"Let's just say a friend of mine "knows his way around the school". What are you going to do with the keys to every room in the school anyway?"

"You'll see."

"Now it's time for your end of the deal."

"Of course." Felix opened the hospital doors and walked inside. He turned to Lucas and said, "Remember, don't come in until you see me leaving with her. It'll probably take me about 5 minutes."

"You're sure you can get her to leave that easily?"

"Positive." Two minutes later Felix walked out of hospital holding Brooke's hand.

"Where are we going?" Brooke asked Felix as they drove off.

"Somewhere special."

The second they were gone, Lucas headed inside. Down the hall, every step he took his nerves began to catch up with him. His heart beat a million miles per hour as he entered Peyton's room.

"Luke?"

"Peyton, we need to talk."

"Ok, let's talk then."

"I've already said everything, Pey. I've spilled my heart to you. Can't you give me an answer?"

"Lucas, I can't hurt Brooke…not again."

"Tell me you don't have any feelings for me at all…and I'll go."

"I can't say that..."

Felix and Brooke

The radio blasted, as Felix sped up the highway. The road twisted around the mountains. Brooke threw her hands in the air, embracing the wind as it flew at her. She turned to Felix. "You made me leave my friend in the hospital. This better be good."

"Don't worry." He said as he stopped the car. "I found this place one day when I was bored." Brooke stepped out and set her eyes on the scene. A perfect view of One Tree Hill was laid out before her. Below the reflection of the moon glimmered on the lake. Felix and Brooke sat down together on the cliff and looked out at the cool night sky above and the city lights underneath.

"So, does it meet with expectations?" Felix asked.

"It's perfect."

Nathan and Haley

"I'd do anything for you." Nathan said as Haley laid in his arms on her hotel room bed. She smiled back at him and took his hand.

"I love you." She said as the knob on the door began to turn. "Sht! That must be Chris. You have to hide."

"Huh? But I'm your husband. Isn't it supposed to be the other way around?" He said as she pushed him under the bed. The chain on the door was locked so that it could only be opened ajar.

"Haley, why is it locked?" Chris yelled from outside.

"Haley, come on…not this again." Nathan said.

"This is the only way." She whispered as she walked over to the door and opened it.

"What was that about?" Chris asked as he walked in.

"You know how dangerous New York can be." She said as Chris shrugged it off. Nathan peeked from under the bed at his wife and wondered which one she was lying to.

After a few minutes Chris decided to call it a night. Haley pretended to sleep until she was sure Chris was asleep.

"Nathan, wake up." She said as she nudged him. He had fallen asleep on the floor.

"Huh? What?"

"Come on. He's finally asleep, time for you to go."

"Great." He half-laughed as he reached the door. "You're a naughty girl sneaking around with your husband."

"Very funny, Nate." She said sarcastically as she slammed the door but Nathan wasn't completely out of the room. He fell on his face as the door ran into him. Haley ran to his side.

"I'm sorry Nathan…so sorry."

"It's ok…" He said, his hope fading. "It's not your fault…You didn't force me to love you. I made that mistake on my own."

Lucas and Peyton

"I can't say that...but that doesn't change the facts." Peyton said, trying hard to be logical about the situation.

"The facts are that I love you and I think you could love me too. This is our chance. True love is once in a lifetime. We can't let this slip away. Won't you at least try?"

"Lucas, you're making this so hard. The timing is just so bad."

"Then I'll wait for you." Lucas held so much hope in his eyes. He was like a puppy stuck out in the rain; she just couldn't leave him out there all alone. She sat up in the hospital bed. He gently rubbed his hand against her face and softly kissed her. Then they backed away and looked deep into each other's eyes. It was point of no return and they stood knee deep in the Rubicon river. The night was not ready to be disturbed, but morning was on its way regardless.

**17 hours ago 5am Thursday Morning**

Brooke and Felix

As the sun began to shine over the horizon, Brooke tapped Felix on his shoulder. "This has been amazing but I have to go back to Peyton now. She's hurt, stuck in the hospital by herself. I need to be there for her."

"I don't think that's a good idea."

The sun rose over world and seemed to begin everything anew. Sunlight illuminated all the places unseen in the night. Haley cried softly lying beside Chris, wondering how much more her fragile universe could take. Nathan laid awake in the back seat of his car, thinking back to the times when things were simpler. A question had been building up all this time in his mind: How far would he go for love? _You can't force it._ He kept thinking. _Maybe I should just give her space. _He thought as noticed daylight slowly creep in through the window. Peyton slept peacefully in Lucas' arms as he ran his fingers through her hair, smiling in his short lived heaven. Meanwhile, Brooke stood up on the verge of anger and said, "What do you mean?" Felix looked up at her now intimidating figure, at a loss for what to do: truth or lie?


End file.
